Numb Heart.

My once warm heart is now numb.

How did this evolve?

I let myself fall in love.

You're so cold and I hate the cold.

With every hug you gave-turned my heart to chills.

Those chills soon became chilling icicles, Before the cold water dripped created a cold little ice tear.

That ice soon grew over, and took over, my heart, causing it to go numb. 

And i can no longer tell what feelings I'm feeling.

What I would do for a heart so warm and surrounding. 

Oh what I would do...

All because I fell in love.

Standing Here.

Standing here.

The wind blowing at 60 miles per hour causing the trees to shake and the earth to quake, and I'm standing here.
The earth revolving around the sun and soldiers dying for our freedom, still I'm standing here.

People getting married, People getting divorced, People singing, People shouting, People crying, People running, People dying and I'm standing here.

The clock is ticking while I'm just standing here.

I think that Its time for me to take a step and move through nature.

Because there is so much freedom in nature,
It won't tell me what to do and what not to do.
It will allow me to do what ever I want.
So much understanding behind it.
So much compassion, and many answers beyond nature.

My next step from just standing here is to take advantage of this sweet living nature.

It once was what it now isn't.

You are what I thought you weren't.

I miss that part of you.
But you are you now.
And I can't do anything about that.

I don't like when I feel like I can't help anything.
I don't like that I literally feel numb, and physically get sick.

I wish it never happened but it needed to, and I'm happy it did.
But why was this the case.

It's never been this bad.

I'm so weak.
I'm so weak.

I miss the innocence.
I feel as if I reach far enough that I could bring it back.
But I guess part of growing up is missing things.

I wish I never left, maybe I could have helped prevent a load.
But what about me?
I learned so, SO much when I was gone, and am so strong now, when maybe if I stayed I wouldn't be able to do for you what I could now.
Possibly.
Probably not.
Maybe.
I don't know.

Sadly the old you is majorly missed.

I know more about you than you think I know.
And I wish you would know your damn worth.

I want to erase everything that happened and start new.

"flooding with emotion, love is holding me tight."

Take me back to the young years now, please. Theres a lot I want to change.

You appeared as fast as breathe fogs up the glass window,
but left as quick as it faded.

You left me broken.